Hello beautiful peoples!
I am not a professional movie critic. Everything in this post (and in every movie review on this blog) is my (and only my) personal opinion.
I have seen the original “Road House” (1989) movie as a teenager in the early 2000’s. Great music. Fantastic characters. Wonderful cast. Interesting storyline. Seen it multiple times since then. I am definitely biased and I am definitely looking at the remake via massive nostalgia glasses. Please treat my “review” as containing spoilers even though I only got to about 31st minute of the “Road House” 2024 remake before giving up. I couldn’t watch it any longer as I was getting angrier with each scene. This movie shouldn’t be called “Road House”. I absolutely hate this shameless money grab attempt. I hope it flops. Badly.
Dalton in the original movie is working as a “cooler” aka. “head bouncer”. He is not just a simple brawler. He is an educated man. Philosophy was his major. I don’t believe he took his studies very seriously, however I am pretty sure that violence was a very last resort for him. He knew how to fight. He chose not to unless absolutely necessary. He would never consider fighting in a fight-club-like ring for money. His reputation and work ethics provided him with steady employment and very good wages. Dalton was not a bum who slept in his car. He also wouldn’t let some jackass in the parking lot stab him in the gut and then duct tape it… Proper medical care was important part of Dalton’s life. He was also very skilled with needle and thread and could stitch his own wounds when necessary.
Dr. Clay in the original movie is a very beautiful, smart, intelligent and classy woman… To quote Wade Garrett “Boy, was she…” Her equivalent in the remake is a boyish smartass loudmouth… Enough said.
Dialogs in this movie are getting progressively worse with every scene. It feels like they try to extend the agony of the viewer by adding more of them.
The story is just as good as the dialogs… I got to the scene on a boat where one moron is trying to shave another one with a straight razor. Boat is dancing on the waves and the moron keeps getting cut… so he punches the captain of the boat in the face… because its somehow his fault? This was IT for me. Stopped the movie, gave it a thumb down and asked Prime Video to “Hide this movie”. Tonight’s events were traumatic enough. I do not want to relive them every time I look at this movie thumbnail…
The more I watched, the angrier I got and I believe this is because I realized, that by comparing the two “Road House” movies which were created 35 years apart, one can clearly see that this world is gone to shit. I have only one more thing to say – I wish euthanasia was legal and cheaper because I would like to check out.
Thank You for reading. I am going to watch the original “Road House” movie tonight. I need a pallet cleanser.
Catch you on the flip side,
AndrzejL
